Queer Platonic Relationships: Are You in One?

Queer platonic relationships are one of the strongest emotional bonds one can form with another person. Before we get into the gist of the article and let you in on some of the signs to look out for if you think you’re in this kind of relationship, let’s first define QPR LGBT relationships. 

What is a Queer Platonic Relationship?

Simply put, queer platonic relationships, also known as QPR relationships, are an intense and intimate relationship that doesn’t have the typical traits of either a romantic relationship or a friendship. While queerplatonic (also quasi-platonic) relationships are asexual, they go beyond the simple meaning of being, ‘just friends’. 

In addition, if there were the possibility or presence of sensual or sexual tension in a quasi-platonic relationship, none of the partners would act on the feeling because it wouldn’t feel right. These relationships aren’t bound by any boundaries and are pure and spontaneous. 

Do You Have to Label Queer Platonic Relationships?

The decision to label a relationship as a queerplatonic relationship is ultimately up to the individuals involved. Some people may find it helpful to use this label to describe the type of relationship they have, while others may not feel the need to use a specific label.

Labeling a relationship as queerplatonic can provide clarity and understanding for those involved and others who may be aware of the relationship. It can also help to communicate to others that the relationship is non-romantic and non-sexual but still has a significant emotional connection and commitment.

However, it’s important to note that labeling a relationship as queerplatonic is not necessary to validate or legitimize the relationship. Ultimately, the most important thing is that both parties feel comfortable and happy with the nature of their relationship, whether or not they choose to use a label to describe it.

The Difference Between Queer Platonic Relationships and Traditional Friendships

Queerplatonic relationships and friendships share some similarities, such as emotional connection, trust, and mutual respect. However, there are some key differences between the two types of relationships.

A QPR relationship typically involves a deeper emotional connection and commitment than a traditional friendship. This can include a sense of exclusivity, where the individuals involved prioritize the relationship above other relationships in their lives. Additionally, queerplatonic relationships may involve a higher level of physical touch and intimacy than traditional friendships, but the nature of the physical touch is typically non-sexual.

Queerplatonic relationships also tend to exist outside of traditional societal norms surrounding romantic and sexual relationships. The individuals involved may not be romantically attracted to each other or may not identify as being within a romantic or sexual orientation, but they still desire a significant emotional connection and commitment.

In contrast, traditional friendships are typically characterized by a lower level of emotional intensity and commitment. While friends may still share emotional intimacy and trust, they do not necessarily prioritize the friendship above other relationships in their lives. Additionally, physical touch and intimacy may be less common or less intense than in a queerplatonic relationship.

How to Recognize Queer Platonic Relationships

You’re ALWAYS excited about spending time with your partner

This is most likely the first sign that you’re in a queerplatonic relationship. There’s no one time that you never want to spend time with the other person and you’re always saying yes to the plans they suggest. You know that spending time with them is so worth it and you are excited to see them. Because a quasi platonic relationship is a special bond, you can and will cancel any plans you had just to see the person you like.

You share a lot (if not all) of yourself with them

When you’re with the person you like, thoughts of having a romantic partner fly out the window and you share your darkest fears and deepest thoughts with them because it feels like the right thing to do. You know you’ve found your soul mate even if there’s no romance involved.

They “get you” more than anyone else could

While everyone else is flabbergasted at your antiques and craziness, your partner understands you the most. There aren’t any boundaries between you and your partner, and you complete each other’s sentences or read each others’ minds.

There’s never an uncomfortable silence between the two of you because you share so many interests. The only thing is, even after spending hours together talking, once you leave each other, you may just remember something you forgot to say.

There’s a small dose of jealousy at the mention of another friend

Just like other relationships, the third wheel in a queerplatonic relationship is a painful concept. However, it’s not the idea of the person you like having other friends that are painful; you just don’t want them to make conversation about their other friends while you’re present. You feel all sorts of special when you’re with your partner and the thought of them mentioning someone else spoils them both for you. However, the feeling isn’t lost on you, they feel the same way too.


While other people voice their opinions about the relationship you have with the person you like, you both know that it’s special and pure. They make you feel complete and brighten up your world in a non-romantic way. Whatever suspicions other people may have of you don’t matter, all that matters is that you keep this special bond going.